he still cannot say goodbye: a haiku (and a prose)

a journey up the snow mt
a journey up a snowy mountain

a silent goodbye
forgetting how they abide
snow covers his hers

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~He still cannot say goodbye, even though he has packed resolutely and steps out and goes up this snowy mountain alone and in silence. Why begin another journey when he knows it will end anyway sometime in future? Often people ask those who travel. Why travel and spend your life there when you know you still have to leave the peak one day and return to base? He has no answer. He likes silence. When he has no words he stays in silence. It is like an invisible shield that covers him and keeps him safe. Sometimes he wishes he can become truly invisible. He can blend into the snowy scene and become a background to the trees. The trees are quite tall up the mountain. He feels so small like he has returned to his childhood again when he stands next to a tree trunk. Do trees talk? Or are they like him, silent? Well, he likes to think he hears them talk. When he is alone and the snow has stopped he can hear them sometimes. They talk in another language, as if they use code that sounds like the wind or the sound of water rushing in an invisible mountain river, tripping over hidden rocks protruding from the river bed. He talks back sometimes. Often he stays silent. He does not have words for them. These days when his heart hurts so much his words have deserted him and hidden in locked chest. His love has taken the key and he can no longer access them. No, he just cannot say goodbye because his love has locked up the “goodbye” word too.


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