For a girl named Peace: “I don’t want to be a tree; I want to be its meaning.”

Ka looks at the snow trail and loses interest. He knows it is not important or relevant to the task at hand. He was born with a destiny and his assignment on earth is to fulfill that destiny. Nothing and no one can obstruct him from achieving that. Not An, no matter how much she may matter to him right now. He takes out his collection of a favorite writer’s quotes from the many books he wrote. Ka has read all his books. Somehow he can relate to those main characters in the books. Very lonely introverts who think a lot inside their hearts but are reluctant to articulate to anyone except perhaps a soul mate who may be non-existent. In a way, the readers become the soul mates of the narrators. Who are Ka’s soul mates? Readers? Why do they read his story? How long will he regard this world as his home?

“For if a lover’s face survives emblazoned on your heart, the world is still your home.” ― Orhan Pamuk, My Name Is Red

Ka does not have a lover (as defined by earth). He doesn’t consider An as even a potential lover. He does not have any agenda regarding establishing any intimate connection with anyone on earth. He is not programed to do that. He was born through a human birth and he has a soul and a spirit as well. But he is not human in terms of his heart. The heart is where all the programming has been done. And his heart controls his body.

In a way he is like a perfect tree. Yet he is not a tree. He has the perfect root system, trunk, branches, leaves and all the externalities of a healthy beautiful tree. Tall, straight, handsome, his countenance majestic and reaches to the sky. Yet, in his heart he knows he is far far more than that. “I don’t want to be a tree; I want to be its meaning.” (Orhan Pamuk) He has a purpose and meaning that no other on earth has. And he is here in this snow land finding out what it is. And here he has met a girl named An (Peace) and it seems there is a meaning in their encounter with each other.

When An says she loves him, he doesn’t know what the word “love” exactly means. Through her words it would appear she means she wants to possess his body and his soul, which is normally what other earthlings mean when using that word. Ka has rejected that word if it means that.

But what does his heart mean when he says he loves her in his heart? He knows it does not mean possession. It means something he wants to give her. The word “love” means “giving” without condition in his case. What does he want to give her? He searches his heart and finds it hard to describe in any language on earth. The best he can say is he wants to protect her and give her security. But they are not yet at war. There are always preparations by default but no one knows the timing. And he doesn’t know when. He has been assigned by his outer-space Source-authority to work on the four winds independently. An earth power has been assigned to give him a special classified status to access to certain military mobility resources.

So what is the meaning of a tree with which he has identified? Ka is still waiting for the answer to the question in his heart. (To be continued)

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