Alas, the waiting is too long…for all that jazz.
This happens a few years later at an international airport. The story character Ka is on transit on his way flying out to a distant isolated classified land for another long assignment on earth just as he has promised the writer Ka in the last SnowLand story. On the other hand, the character Peace happens to have just flown in to see a new client on her design assignment. Here is the conversation between the two story characters after they greet each other politely like any acquaintances do. They are sitting in Starbucks for a quick drink and a brief update for the limited time at hand.
K: It’s been some time since the SnowLand ending and you don’t seem to have changed.
P: Thank you. Neither have you.
K: How are things with you?
P: I am still in my interior design profession. You? How come you have come back to earth? I thought you couldn’t change back from the light form?
K: I have been promoted. I am now able to transform between the physical and the invisible existence, which seems like light in your perception. I have been assigned a new mission.
P: There is something I want you to answer me honestly. Why didn’t you ever come for me? I thought you have promised!
K: No. I didn’t say that. In our last goodbye I said I would be circling earth and other planets in a light form and yearly if you care to look up on a certain date I can manifest to you and let you know that light form is me regardless where you may be on that date.
P: I thought you would appear to me the way you did at my window at the last farewell in SnowLand. And you never did. Anyway I didn’t carry out the additional year’s design commission. I left SnowLand and returned home as soon as you left.
K: I know. K2 told me.
P: I was disappointed you never came as I thought you would. I am also disappointed now when I see that you can transform into a man again and you never bother to contact me and tell me you have returned to earth!
K: It is a classified secret. I am not even supposed to be talking to you. I know you are safe and well. That is all I need to know. Now that you have seen me and know I am safe and well too, there is really nothing else that matters. Right?
K: You see, I am doing an important job that protects all mankind, including you and your loved ones. Isn’t it better this way?
P: Yes. I will always remember what you have come to earth for and how you are willing to give even your life to defend the earthlings and the one you love. O, how I have missed you, K. (She burst into tears.)
K: (silence until P stops sobbing.)
P: If only we were like normal earth couple, living a normal happy life with each other for a long long time. K2 is not you! I don’t want to grow old with him! That’s why I left immediately.
K: There is no “If only” in earth life. Nothing can repeat or replace itself. Even the water flowing through a river. Not the same water flows through even though they may look alike to our eyes. I know K2 cannot be me.
P: Is it too late to start afresh now? Is it not in your agenda?
K: We have missed the appointment that brief season on earth that time offered. What is written cannot be unwritten. It is over, A. (Her original name) In fact, you are not the same anymore in time. Neither am I. The truth is every moment in time on earth can never be repeated or replaced.
P: Like the water.
K: Yes, like the water. Or a snowflake. Since I am on earth I won’t be encircling the earth for a long long time. I won’t be communicating with you or anyone.
P: How shall I know you are still on earth? I am now an ordinary earth woman living by faith in the light. I have no dark power to link to you or find you anymore.
K: When you look up the sky at night when the sky is clear and full of light, you can find a bright star that seems to be constantly fixed in the North. That star signifies me, still on earth, guarding earth.
P: (Sobbing again. then she composes herself and looks at K.)
K: They have just called for boarding. I have got to leave now. Remember the song by Mark Knopfler “wherever I go”? Nice song to listen to. There’s a place in my heart, may you always know, I’ll keep a flame there for you, Wherever I go. Goodbye.
Mark Knopfler’s “Wherever I Go”
(feat. Ruth Moody)
Maybe I’m bound to wander
From one place to the next
Heaven knows why
But in the wild blue yonder
Your star is fixed in my sky
Just another bar at a crossroads
So far from home
But that’s alright
Whenever I’m going down a dark road
I don’t feel alone in the night
There’s a place in my heart
Though we’re far apart
May you always know
No matter how long since I saw you
I’ll keep a flame there for you
Wherever I go
They’re looking to close up in here
They’re pulling down the blinds
But they’ll let you stay awhile
They’re not going to mind
Now I’ve got to leave you, brother
So this round’s mine
Here’s looking at you, anyhow
You can go on and have another
They won’t call time
I’m going to say my goodbyes now
There’s a place in my heart
Though we’re far apart
May you always know
No matter how long since I saw you
I’ll keep a flame there for you
Wherever I go
Last Christmas I attempted a new mini-series about a man named Ka from another realm being born into the earth life to complete an assignment on earth. He is assigned to a place called Snowland where he meets a girl named Peace. There are sixteen episodes. In each episode there is a quote from Orhan Pamuk’s books. And I used the quote to work on a theme for that episode. The writer of the series named Ka is a fictitious character. He writes himself into the story and interacts with the hero Ka. The two main characters (Ka and Peace) in the story are based on glimpses of two real persons who reveal themselves in bits and pieces in the experience of Ka the writer.
Looking back, it is quite an experiment to weave a story around two persons in the future. The main goal is to bring out the subject of the essence of future love. I imagine a world interacting with other worlds, human beings interacting with other intelligent beings. In this story the other being is far more intelligent and advanced in terms of existence in his realm. The future character Ka comes for a mission which requires a much higher level of science and technology. At the same time he has a secondary goal, to write a book about the essence of love for the woman character Peace.
What is true love? He describes it and lives it with his earth life. In essence, love means giving without expectation of return. Love means not possessing. Love is not a commodity of exchange, unlike human usage.
The futuristic world of Ka is a world of light. It is formed of the essence of goodness and love, the essence of the Creator, whom he calls, the Source.
Do human have revelation of this reality beyond them and their present world? The answer is yes. There are revelations in the history of mankind. There are humans who have received such enlightenment and tried to write about it. Often we find glimpses of them in various fictions.
We also find it in human heart. There is a tiny hidden spot in each heart where a selfless seed is waiting to be born. A love that goes beyond utility. A love that transcends above everything we have been taught and learned to acquire in earth life.
Does such a love ever manifest in human life? Yes. Sometimes we read about others who give their lives without expecting a return from others. Sometimes we find ourselves giving in such a way that it seems foolish and naive in the eyes of others. Yes, the seed of greatness does manifest itself in our life-time when we allow it to be born.
To such a one, at the moment when the essence of love comes forth in the physical realm, others’ misunderstanding, mistaken views, good or bad, about your perspectives, your actions, and even your motives, no longer matter.
How does Ka the writer work this out? “Good fiction is about asserting the beauties of the world, inventing a new, positive thing. Where am I going to get that? And it should be original; it should not be cliched. So the way I looked at history was not to accuse it of failure.” (Orhan Pamuk)
Our lives are history. After you accumulate lots of years of reading, writing, and practicing living the ideal, you are one step ahead at least in knowing what is good ahead as you write your good future.
Has this blogger, the spiritual mindman, anything to do with the above, creating the writer Ka, and the story character Ka from a future realm? The answer is in the blogs that had started in 2012. Do read some of the earlier blogs and stories.
Meanwhile, is there a sequel for the completed series “For a girl named Peace” which I have already removed from this blog? The sequel is being written, daily by the main characters. In the heart. In decision making. In choices in lives. In lifestyle.
Snowland. May 2020.
a Quest for light
He is a lover of light and high mountains. He took this photo last winter standing on a mountain. The original scene was breathtaking. It was a sunny day, and the clouds were dispersed. There were distant mountains too. He cannot now remember whether the blue and white patches below the sun were mountains or mere sky. Where he stood and took this picture was the limit of his quest then. Given another chance, perhaps he would go further beyond the blue deep space…
is a comparative advantage. It is also the outside limit of an object, area, or surface; a place or part farthest away from the center of something. I took this photo on a train climbing a mountain. The river looks as if it is at the edge of the track. I probably slanted my mobile phone camera quite steeply or perhaps the climb was rather steep. We went up to 7000 ft and then descended to around 4000 ft to stay in a very scenic town and ski resort. When I first discovered that we were to climb 7000 ft in a train I was a bit concerned. I wondered how it would be like cutting through the mountain with a steep edge on the side of the track. As we settled ourselves in very comfortable coaches and started taking photos we hardly noticed the climb. It was very pleasant and the edge was not noticeable at that time. Only when I now look at the photos and recall the scenes I marvel at how we can always look at the positive side of things and enjoy lives despite the environment. A merry heart does have its edge over a miserable heart in challenging circumstances.
Mirror a wordless reflection one morning in winter. Wordless beauty.
Looking at this today brings back long gone memory of a time when he first had a glimpse of her in the mirror. She was getting ready to go to work. He watched her at the door. He could only see her back. But then he saw her smiling in the mirrored reflection. She has her way of smiling which captures heart. Many years ago. Sparkling eyes smiling. He never forgets that smile. Wordless and yet beautiful. He cannot forget.
my front yard’s sunset floating
I took this photo on 20151229 again in a hurry one evening in California. The place is a must see site because of its famous reflection of beautiful and colorful houses on water. The panoramic view did not turn out well as I was using an older Samsung then. But the static single shots were good. This one is my favorite. Will I want to live in one of these mirrored watery homes? My answer is, “No, thank you.” I still love my own little park with the trees mirroring my life as they stretch upward towards the blue sky where eagles soar.
couples in love just dating
frame framed and framing
One day we went to this place for a brief break. It was a normal day with families and couples around taking their normal meals. I found the framed ceiling structure interesting for no particular reason and took some random photos. I remember we went at night but the photos now seem to show otherwise. Puzzling. Like life.
find the little fox
She is back. He is back. They are not relatives. But the two humans are not together. And yet they love each other.
It is like looking at this photo. You never know whether the photographer is climbing up the mountain or going down the slope. There is no clue. Perhaps you can detect the lonely depression induced by the season from thin trees with bare branches, the snow covered plants shaped like little animals scurrying on the ground, against a grey bland sky and the an overall mood of foreboding of the scene. But you will not know why the photographer went there and took this picture unless you were him. When he took this picture he was actually climbing uphill. It was mid-January.
They did not meet that time. She was too far away and otherwise engaged. He went alone and spent his winter like a lone wolf.
Now they are both back to one place. Same city. Same street. Same house. He is alone. She is alone. He is not married. Neither is she. They love each other. But they are not together. Why are they not together? A complicated riddle.
(I decided to post this blog after leaving the unfinished draft for a month or more. The shape of a lone wolf is too striking to be ignored. Other shapes of animals too. I like seeing living things in shapes formed by nature. I also added a little riddle here to ponder upon on sleepless nights.)
minding our business
looping comes from flying tram
motion froze in frame
I took this shot at a train station. The two “photographers” appeared suddenly while we were waiting for the train to continue to the next stop. While they were setting up their gears on ground I took this photo. I never knew what they were preparing to shoot. But it is a reflection of life. Whilst we are busy making art (or substitute any word you want) we become the art (do likewise) itself.
Yes, you are rare. In my eyes. Today, I walk pass this way without expecting to see you. I am just walking and not looking. I am busy because I am going somewhere. This pathway and roadside are just things I happen to walk by from one spot to another spot. My destination is somewhere else. My interest is not here. I am just traveling by. But I see you. You look at me and smile. You reach out your invisible hand and offer a friendly greeting. Here, this neighborhood? Yes, you stand out despite the environment. The background. The class in which you find yourself. You display your purple. We exchange greeting for a while and I halt my steps for you for awhile. When I move on I know I have encountered a unique rarity. A simple greeting one morning between a traveler and a sidewalk on which I have imprinted my steps one morning which will not be repeated again. The next time I visit this place again it will be another time. A moment in time is rare and unique with its own existence.
Cherry On TopThe day was like any ordinary day. We were all set to go to a hot spring and this picture was taken from a coach. The guide said we would go near the mountain but not too near. At that time they were speculating that it might have some volcanic activities unsuitable for travelers. It had not erupted since the 18th century. But we were told to be cautious. Anyway we had a good ride to the place famous for its hot spring. The idea of a sleepy mountain suddenly woke up and erupting into an inferno was a bit unsettling for the travelers.
But the company was good and some sang songs to cheer up the rest.
We started early in the morning but arrived in the evening due to slow traffic and closure of certain stretches of the highway. There was no road rage even though traffic was crawling and we moved practically in terms of inches. I looked out of the window and saw other drivers and passengers unperturbed and calm sitting in their cars and waited to inch forward. As a mere traveler I could only look at the people superficially. The mountains looked beautiful from afar. And we were told not to go near. I did not visit the country again after December 2007. In 2011 it was struck with the most powerful earthquake ever recorded to have hit Japan, and the fourth most powerful earthquake in the world since modern record-keeping began in 1900.
I quote below passages from the wikipedia: “Japan has also been the site of some of the 10 worst natural disasters of the 21st century. The types of natural disasters in Japan include tsunamis, floods, typhoons, earthquakes, and volcanic eruptions. The country has gone through many years of natural disasters, affecting its economy, development, and social life. The 2011 Tōhoku earthquake and tsunami were devastating.On 10 March 2015, a Japanese National Police Agency report confirmed 15,894 deaths,6,152 injured, and 2,562 people missing across twenty prefectures, as well as 228,863 people living away from their home in either temporary housing or due to permanent relocation. The tsunami caused nuclear accidents, primarily the level 7 meltdowns at three reactors in the Fukushima Daiichi Nuclear Power Plant complex, and the associated evacuation zones affecting hundreds of thousands of residents.”
An internet blogging Japanese friend who used to work and stay in Tokyo lost contact after the disaster. We used to share one common interest: We were both avid fans of Kazuo Ishiguro (who created remarkable stories of love, loss and hidden truths in The Remains of the Day and Never Let Me Go.) and we both liked the movie Australia. His website remained the same as many years ago and froze in a space and time. I gave up visiting his web blog eventually.
Cherry On Top
It was a day before Christmas eve nine years ago. A time to celebrate the peace and goodwill promised to mankind. There were a bus load of us. You were sitting next to me. The ride was comfortable and the weather was fine. Indeed a mild winter. The guide told us to expect a sumptuous dinner of the best sushi ever served. He also took order of those who wanted a taste of the Hokkaido . King crab or Tarabagani, and Kobe veal. Bath in hot spring. Arrayed in the local cultural costumes for dinner. We truly enjoyed the experience in a different culture. I remember we told the host we would visit them again. But we never went back together. I never went back.
I remember you said you liked their mountain.
This is another view of the famous mountain. I hope you like it.
Cherry On Top
You know this is a letter I will not send. It is an ordinary letter about how things are with me. The summer is ending and the last blooms outside my window have just withered. Soon it will be autumn and winter again. Today I looked into a drawer which I have not opened for a long time, perhaps years, and found this photo hidden in a memory card. Remember that morning in December 2007 we traveled? You suddenly wanted me to stop the coach. I asked the driver to stop. We got down and took this photo and others. I never sent this card to the studio for prints. Somehow I put it in the drawer locked together with many other precious and happy memories. Digital camera was popular then and I was using a Nikon Coolpix 7900 with 7.1 megapixels. The photos came out well for that journey. I found many portraits of you too. Long hair blowing in the gentle breeze of winter. Radiant smiles. I can even smell the fresh, cold and crisp mountain air when looking at the photos. Pity we didn’t go to any winter sports destination after all. The best photos are those of mountains like this one. I am not sending this because you have taken your own photos too. Perhaps after all these years you would not want me to send you the photos in this long forgotten memory card. Yesterday someone came back from the faraway land and told me that you have not changed much. But you no longer keep long hair. The mountains, they said, are still beautiful.
alien here I dread
print upon print I now thread
deserted I read
(After I wrote this little poem of a scene I took in US last January, I suddenly realize now of somewhat similar perspective in terms of man and nature left alone, expressed in two previous movie stories, both of which I had not watched. I googled and saw their brief reviews. The Revenant and Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail. I would add that the ‘loneliness’ can also be felt in virtual space perspective. The word ‘thread’ is deliberate to bring out another kind of desert effect. Not a misspelt.)
Look Upholding fast his dream
like snow-covered hidden stream
(please complete for him)
Sad sky with glum sign
many pauses many sighs
heart forlorn desires
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~”Whether I shall turn out to be the hero of my own life, or whether that station will be held by anybody else, these pages must show.” He never wants to be a hero even though he recalls this famous first line from a text book of his childhood. This is a duplicate of an English town in the middle of the States. It is strange that a quaint little town brings back such a lot of memories of his very young days in England, or to be precise, London. He has often dreamed of that city after leaving her. He did not have a choice then. There was no provision for him to stay on after he returned from Paris to encounter a brief but very cold winter in London. He always remembers that winter morning. His boss called him in and announced the good news, “Here, have a cup of tea, one sugar? a spot of milk?” The boss was exceptionally civil that fateful morning. He had a spotless glass window room which signified his status. The single tree outside his window was bare and its friendly branches were leaning over and gently tapping the glass pane. “I must say that I am envious of you, going to such exotic and interesting places. But of course I have been to many in my own days…” So he was selected to go to his first posting overseas in a nation beyond many seas and oceans with limitless opportunities for a young executive. What better choice did he have staying in London? None. He stepped into the street as the boss decided to let him off for the rest of the day to sort out his thoughts and perhaps other matters. He was scheduled to travel a week later. He decided to pick just one priority, and took a metro to Charing Cross, the Foyles Bookstore. He collected all the Swallows and Amazons series by Arthur Ransome and Collections of Giles’s cartoons. Then he left and had a cup of coffee next to the bookstore. That was his personal Brexit. Did he ever return? Yes, several times. But London was a foreign country by then. His childhood friend left and chose to live in a tropical city with her husband. They left for health reason. Will he return again? Perhaps, when days are brighter after the real Brexit. Is there any other city he wants to go back to? Yes, perhaps Paris. Not now though. He has just returned from San Francisco. Not going back for a long time. Is there no city he can go? Not Shanghai either. Not the big ones. Sad, but true. To be accurate, it had been: Lonexit, Paexit, SAexit, Shanexit…and to sum it all, Cityexit.
1 he sounded forlorn: unhappy, sad, miserable, sorrowful, dejected, despondent, disconsolate, wretched, abject, down, downcast, dispirited, downhearted, crestfallen, depressed, melancholy, gloomy, glum, mournful, despairing, doleful, woebegone; informal blue, down in/at the mouth, down in the dumps; rare lachrymose. ANTONYMS happy.
2 a forlorn garden: desolate, deserted, abandoned, forsaken, forgotten, neglected. ANTONYMS cared for.
3 a forlorn attempt: hopeless, vain, with no chance of success; useless, futile, pointless, purposeless, unavailing, nugatory; archaic bootless. ANTONYMS hopeful, sure-fire.
Snow refused to melt
like cards unrelenting dealt
queen to king her heart
none better than love-passion
seldom with ration
“It has to be love, doesn’t it? In however many of its infinite permutations?” “What lasts? Is there anything you’ve made in your life that will still be here 150 years from now? What does not last, if they are not retold, are the stories.” How true these words from a recent reading are. He ponders. When he thinks of all the events that happened before in his young life and hers he knows there is no explanation except love. Love binds their two hearts and spurs them to do things beyond their wildest dream. The union of their hearts and minds crystallizes into something dazzling and brilliant. If he is not telling their stories now whatever that they have together accomplished for which they have given so much of their lives would not last after they are gone. He wants to leave a legacy to his loved one. A legacy of their story.
opening in sky
often makes him wonder why
causing him to sigh